"If you want to be treated like everyone else, why do you spend so much time pointing out how different you are?"
I hate that question. I don't celebrate pride to be "different", no more than someone celebrates Christmas or Eid to be different. It's just part of who I am, it is a very important part of my selfness. It's part of my history, of our history, of our struggles and our triumphs. So yes, I celebrate pride with excitement and fondness.
And it's not about being different, it's about remembering history and celebrating what makes me, well, me. I celebrate pride because it's a place where I know, no questions asked, I will be accepted. I celebrate pride because I know every year, when I walk down to the festival there will be at least one person who realizes that life is okay right now because there are thousands of people just like me hanging out together. I celebrate pride because I know that I will have a blast and meet new people who only accept instead of judge. It's nice to be accepted, to be welcome, no questions asked.
So why pride? Because my whole life I have been rejected for who I am, nothing more. At Pride, I am not rejected, I am embraced and celebrated. So yes, June is all about Pride for me. I attend festivals, I wish others "Happy Pride", I embrace who I am in ways I don't other times of the year.
Pride is a celebration, and I'm gonna celebrate.
Until Next Time!
Sunday, May 31, 2015
Friday, May 29, 2015
2nd Annual PRIDE month postalong
So for the second year in a row I plan to make June's posts all revolve around PRIDE month. I am gay, no question about that, so Pride month is very important to me. As a result, Pride is on my mind in June. So things have been a little quiet around here as I prepare for June.
Do you have any suggestions for blog posts for June? Just let me know!
Until Next Time!
Do you have any suggestions for blog posts for June? Just let me know!
Until Next Time!
Friday, May 22, 2015
Adulting
From lack of motivation to adulting and getting this shit done. I am doing it. I really have little choice, because it has to be done, but dammit I am doing it!
We finally bought a new lawn mower. Talk about a needed upgrade. My partner has been out mowing the law for only 30 minutes and he already has the back completely finished! That is an accomplishment of our new mower! And it has a bag, so there isn't grass clipping everywhere. And no, we don't throw out the clipping, we use them to fertilize under the trees to help stop soil erosion. Needless to say, I am pretty sure he will be finished with the law much much quicker than his normal 2 or so hours. Which means he may have the energy and time to weed wack! That is always an exciting time around here.
I got out into the garden today and finally planted the petunias and tulip bulbs. We have a front garden we have had to dig up multiple times because of an invasive grass species. I think after almost 8 years we have it under control, so we are doing one more controlled plant of annuals. If all goes well this year, I hope that the tulips will come back and then we will need some summer loving perennials to put in the garden. I don't like planting every year. I would much rather plan out my color palette and weed and mulch at the the start of the season and then let my garden work for me. We have the other two gardens already set up this way, now with this last one hopefully I will be done except for pruning and weeding every year. Oh that would be an accomplishment.
This weekend we plan to spend our time early on finishing the yard and then from there we hope to grill out and just relax. Nothing massive is pressing on our time, we might even go see a movie! At the theatre! I wish we had better live theatre here... but alas, we do not. But at the movie house we go to they have good old fashioned cherry coke on tap... which means cherry coke and popcorn! Not healthy, but delicious!
What plans do you have this weekend? Anything exciting?
Until Next Time!
We finally bought a new lawn mower. Talk about a needed upgrade. My partner has been out mowing the law for only 30 minutes and he already has the back completely finished! That is an accomplishment of our new mower! And it has a bag, so there isn't grass clipping everywhere. And no, we don't throw out the clipping, we use them to fertilize under the trees to help stop soil erosion. Needless to say, I am pretty sure he will be finished with the law much much quicker than his normal 2 or so hours. Which means he may have the energy and time to weed wack! That is always an exciting time around here.
I got out into the garden today and finally planted the petunias and tulip bulbs. We have a front garden we have had to dig up multiple times because of an invasive grass species. I think after almost 8 years we have it under control, so we are doing one more controlled plant of annuals. If all goes well this year, I hope that the tulips will come back and then we will need some summer loving perennials to put in the garden. I don't like planting every year. I would much rather plan out my color palette and weed and mulch at the the start of the season and then let my garden work for me. We have the other two gardens already set up this way, now with this last one hopefully I will be done except for pruning and weeding every year. Oh that would be an accomplishment.
This weekend we plan to spend our time early on finishing the yard and then from there we hope to grill out and just relax. Nothing massive is pressing on our time, we might even go see a movie! At the theatre! I wish we had better live theatre here... but alas, we do not. But at the movie house we go to they have good old fashioned cherry coke on tap... which means cherry coke and popcorn! Not healthy, but delicious!
What plans do you have this weekend? Anything exciting?
Until Next Time!
Wednesday, May 20, 2015
Lack of motivation
I have no motivation to do anything. I don't know if I'm getting sick or if I'm just being lazy, but I really just want to sit here and do nothing.
It is starting to affect me in ways I hadn't planned on. I have an entire house to clean, a yard to landscape, and meals to prep before baby comes home. But I think some of it is we've been here before, and I did all that, and we walked away empty handed. I think maybe that is getting in my head and keeping me from doing things I need to.
And I really need it to go away.
It's times like these that I wonder if I'm not giving too much space in my head to things I cannot control. I cannot control our past, but I can control our future. I need to keep that in mind. Yes, this situation may fall through as well, but at least I will have a spotless house and meals for the next month. That is a good thing, right?
I dunno, I don't know the answer. I guess I just have to keep telling myself to get up and go and move and get shit done. That is the best way to combat the lazies. I also plan to sit down and do some writing this weekend (as it's the first weekend we have at home in a long time!) so hopefully that will help get some feelings out of the gate. I also have my partner home for a long weekend. Half day on Friday, off on Monday, he's going to be so spoiled!
I hope you are having a better, more productive week and I am having!
Until Next Time!
It is starting to affect me in ways I hadn't planned on. I have an entire house to clean, a yard to landscape, and meals to prep before baby comes home. But I think some of it is we've been here before, and I did all that, and we walked away empty handed. I think maybe that is getting in my head and keeping me from doing things I need to.
And I really need it to go away.
It's times like these that I wonder if I'm not giving too much space in my head to things I cannot control. I cannot control our past, but I can control our future. I need to keep that in mind. Yes, this situation may fall through as well, but at least I will have a spotless house and meals for the next month. That is a good thing, right?
I dunno, I don't know the answer. I guess I just have to keep telling myself to get up and go and move and get shit done. That is the best way to combat the lazies. I also plan to sit down and do some writing this weekend (as it's the first weekend we have at home in a long time!) so hopefully that will help get some feelings out of the gate. I also have my partner home for a long weekend. Half day on Friday, off on Monday, he's going to be so spoiled!
I hope you are having a better, more productive week and I am having!
Until Next Time!
Sunday, May 17, 2015
What weekend?
I am sure we are sitting on the tail end of another weekend, but I'm not sure where that weekend has gone. Actually, I do. This weekend went to being with kick ass people and hanging out with friends and doing normal people things. That's where this weekend went.
And. It. Was. Awesome.
A friend of ours is moving away so this weekend was her surprise going away party. So we packed up, drove 3 hours north, and drank ourselves silly as a way of saying bon voyage. I am sad that she is moving away, but I know it's for greater and better things.
Because of that, our weekend flew by. We find ourselves doing laundry late again and the grocery store was a haphazard, thrown together list. Still worth it.
So now another week starts. With this week comes a promise of renewal of all the things we want to do, as well as some things we feel we have to do. My partner has been having some stomach issues, so we are slowly working our way through cutting out known food groups that seem to be contributing. The first is going to be dairy, so this week starts that. I really hope this helps his stomach because it sucks to see the ones you love in pain.
This week is also the week I put together the largest packing list for bringing home babby that you've ever seen. I like to think of it as a cross between first time parent and just a nervous packer in general. We are still cautiously excited. Around 9 weeks left.
Hopefully the time will slow down slightly. We have nothing planned this weekend, so hopefully we will get a little time to ourselves. If not, it's okay, we have living our lives and having a kickass time doing it!
Until Next Time.
And. It. Was. Awesome.
A friend of ours is moving away so this weekend was her surprise going away party. So we packed up, drove 3 hours north, and drank ourselves silly as a way of saying bon voyage. I am sad that she is moving away, but I know it's for greater and better things.
Because of that, our weekend flew by. We find ourselves doing laundry late again and the grocery store was a haphazard, thrown together list. Still worth it.
So now another week starts. With this week comes a promise of renewal of all the things we want to do, as well as some things we feel we have to do. My partner has been having some stomach issues, so we are slowly working our way through cutting out known food groups that seem to be contributing. The first is going to be dairy, so this week starts that. I really hope this helps his stomach because it sucks to see the ones you love in pain.
This week is also the week I put together the largest packing list for bringing home babby that you've ever seen. I like to think of it as a cross between first time parent and just a nervous packer in general. We are still cautiously excited. Around 9 weeks left.
Hopefully the time will slow down slightly. We have nothing planned this weekend, so hopefully we will get a little time to ourselves. If not, it's okay, we have living our lives and having a kickass time doing it!
Until Next Time.
Friday, May 15, 2015
So much, yet nothing at all
So much has been going on that the spring/summer is flying by! We are already half way through May and holy cow where did the time go?
And yet, everything is going so fucking slowly. We found out the expectant mom we have matched with is having a girl. We are going to hopefully have a daughter. With roughly 9 weeks left, it's taking so long already! Haha!
I have been spending my time sewing little girl dresses and trying to figure out if I'm crafty enough to attempt pants. I am also working on getting the nursery set back up. The reality is we've been at this having a baby game for 5 years. Five fucking years people. So our nursery has been set up for 4.5 years and after each failed attempt to start a family it just gained another layer of dust. So in an effort to stay positive and let myself be okay with either outcome of this roller coaster, I have been in the nursery cleaning it up. It is coming together slowly but surely.
Other than baby watch 2015, my partner and I have been staying busy by traveling everywhere and visiting friends and planning other trips. We have been so busy moving around that my poor house looks like a bomb went off in it. We haven't had time to sit down and clean anything. Even today, I am taking 15 minutes to write up this blog post, but then it's off to the races again.
With so much to do my writing has suffered. I really want to have time to sit down at my computer and just put things together. I have so many ideas and I really want to put pen to paper, but I just haven't made time. Oh you read that right, not that I haven't had time, I just haven't made time. I need to get back to writing being a priority. I want to make sure I have the bare bones of several writing tasks for when baby comes home and I'm in the house while she sleeps. That is on my main to do list.
I hope you are having a busy and productive summer as well!
Until Next Time!
And yet, everything is going so fucking slowly. We found out the expectant mom we have matched with is having a girl. We are going to hopefully have a daughter. With roughly 9 weeks left, it's taking so long already! Haha!
I have been spending my time sewing little girl dresses and trying to figure out if I'm crafty enough to attempt pants. I am also working on getting the nursery set back up. The reality is we've been at this having a baby game for 5 years. Five fucking years people. So our nursery has been set up for 4.5 years and after each failed attempt to start a family it just gained another layer of dust. So in an effort to stay positive and let myself be okay with either outcome of this roller coaster, I have been in the nursery cleaning it up. It is coming together slowly but surely.
Other than baby watch 2015, my partner and I have been staying busy by traveling everywhere and visiting friends and planning other trips. We have been so busy moving around that my poor house looks like a bomb went off in it. We haven't had time to sit down and clean anything. Even today, I am taking 15 minutes to write up this blog post, but then it's off to the races again.
With so much to do my writing has suffered. I really want to have time to sit down at my computer and just put things together. I have so many ideas and I really want to put pen to paper, but I just haven't made time. Oh you read that right, not that I haven't had time, I just haven't made time. I need to get back to writing being a priority. I want to make sure I have the bare bones of several writing tasks for when baby comes home and I'm in the house while she sleeps. That is on my main to do list.
I hope you are having a busy and productive summer as well!
Until Next Time!
Sunday, May 10, 2015
Are you gonna make your baby gay?
Once upon a time there was a soon to be dad waiting in line at a big box chain baby store to buy an item on sale with a coupon. It was early, he chose early on purpose, to avoid the crowds. Apparently everyone else had the same idea as the store was packed. As he was standing in line, a woman soon to be dad (STBD) worked with came up behind him. As he knew her, they struck up a conversation.
Granted, STBD hadn't seen this woman in a couple of years but learned that she was having her second child in 2 years and she was super excited. He was super excited for her! As the line inched slowly forward, the conversation turned to his pending adoption and the excitement that maybe the third time would be the charm for him and his partner.
And then it happened.
The woman's face scrunched up slightly. STBD realized that she may not have known he was gay... how, he wasn't sure, but their work place had been at a religious organization so it may just not have come up. The woman inquired slightly as to "the Partner" in the sentence. She recovered quickly from her minor face scrunching and congratulated STBD. But the conversation quickly got awkward.
Then she nailed the coffin shut on the conversation.
"Are you going to make your baby gay?" She was serious. "I have read that gay parents are more likely to have gay kids." It took everything in STBD's power to not react out of anger.
Do people seriously still think that you will turn out exact like your parents? I mean, my parents are straight, I'm not. My partner's parents are straight, he's not. Why is this still a question? The reality is my sexuality has nothing to do with my future children. My sexuality is nothing to do with kids. This idea that homosexuals are out to recruit children is so outdated that it's insulting at this point that people still follow that line of thinking.
I am not having children to "make them gay". I am not having children to recruit more into the ebil homosexual lifestyle. I am having kids for the same reason everyone else has a child, because I want to have a family that includes children. Pretty plain and simple.
Now, that said, my partner and I ARE gay. And pretty damn proud of it. So our "lifestyle" will not be hidden from our children. We will be out and proud with our daughter (and future daughters or sons, whatever we may get) and she will know that her dads both love her. She will attend pride parades with us, she will not be shied away from the fact that her dads are gay. Chances are she will be exposed to more gay people than "normal", but simply because we find strength in numbers.
But no matter how many pride parades we take her too, or how many gay friends we have, we will have no influence on her sexuality. You either are, or aren't. No amount of parental influence or shunning has turned me straight and the same is true for our future children. No amount of our influence will turn our, or your, children gay.
However, I don't think we'll be hanging out at new parent things any time soon.
Until Next Time.
Granted, STBD hadn't seen this woman in a couple of years but learned that she was having her second child in 2 years and she was super excited. He was super excited for her! As the line inched slowly forward, the conversation turned to his pending adoption and the excitement that maybe the third time would be the charm for him and his partner.
And then it happened.
The woman's face scrunched up slightly. STBD realized that she may not have known he was gay... how, he wasn't sure, but their work place had been at a religious organization so it may just not have come up. The woman inquired slightly as to "the Partner" in the sentence. She recovered quickly from her minor face scrunching and congratulated STBD. But the conversation quickly got awkward.
Then she nailed the coffin shut on the conversation.
"Are you going to make your baby gay?" She was serious. "I have read that gay parents are more likely to have gay kids." It took everything in STBD's power to not react out of anger.
Do people seriously still think that you will turn out exact like your parents? I mean, my parents are straight, I'm not. My partner's parents are straight, he's not. Why is this still a question? The reality is my sexuality has nothing to do with my future children. My sexuality is nothing to do with kids. This idea that homosexuals are out to recruit children is so outdated that it's insulting at this point that people still follow that line of thinking.
I am not having children to "make them gay". I am not having children to recruit more into the ebil homosexual lifestyle. I am having kids for the same reason everyone else has a child, because I want to have a family that includes children. Pretty plain and simple.
Now, that said, my partner and I ARE gay. And pretty damn proud of it. So our "lifestyle" will not be hidden from our children. We will be out and proud with our daughter (and future daughters or sons, whatever we may get) and she will know that her dads both love her. She will attend pride parades with us, she will not be shied away from the fact that her dads are gay. Chances are she will be exposed to more gay people than "normal", but simply because we find strength in numbers.
But no matter how many pride parades we take her too, or how many gay friends we have, we will have no influence on her sexuality. You either are, or aren't. No amount of parental influence or shunning has turned me straight and the same is true for our future children. No amount of our influence will turn our, or your, children gay.
However, I don't think we'll be hanging out at new parent things any time soon.
Until Next Time.
Thursday, May 7, 2015
I survived
I survived finals, and I may get an A I didn't count on. Woohoo!
Life is moving forward at a lightening pace. It is amazing that so much time has flown by. I feel like a week ago I started the semester and yesterday we matched... but in reality it was over 5 months ago that my semester started and 3 months ago that we matched. Now I am done with the semester completely and in 10 weeks we will hopefully have a baby in our hands. Crazy times!
Today we received ultrasound pictures of the child who will hopefully become our daughter. She's a girl (at least chromosomally)! We are cautiously excited about the whole process. We have been fighting tooth and nail to get as much information as we can and seeing the pictures and the video is amazing. We are trying to avoid getting too too happy about it (failed adoptions will do that to you), but secretly we are both pretty happy.
With hearing that the baby is a girl, we have started slowly telling people. It's not like we have a lot of people to tell in real life... but his family, a few friends. I am dreading the influx of pink people will buy but I have yet to figured out a tactful way of saying "Please don't drown us in pink..." As she ages, if she loves pink then she loves pink... but I really hate needlessly gendered products and pink washing (I equally despise blue washing for boys...). Either way, I am excited to get clothes and stuffs together.
This is the first week I've had off and I am excited to get into the nursery this week. It has been set up for 4.5 years, but I need to get in there and do a deep cleaning. I am excited to get everything back in order and ready for a new baby.
A baby.
Until Next Time.
Life is moving forward at a lightening pace. It is amazing that so much time has flown by. I feel like a week ago I started the semester and yesterday we matched... but in reality it was over 5 months ago that my semester started and 3 months ago that we matched. Now I am done with the semester completely and in 10 weeks we will hopefully have a baby in our hands. Crazy times!
Today we received ultrasound pictures of the child who will hopefully become our daughter. She's a girl (at least chromosomally)! We are cautiously excited about the whole process. We have been fighting tooth and nail to get as much information as we can and seeing the pictures and the video is amazing. We are trying to avoid getting too too happy about it (failed adoptions will do that to you), but secretly we are both pretty happy.
With hearing that the baby is a girl, we have started slowly telling people. It's not like we have a lot of people to tell in real life... but his family, a few friends. I am dreading the influx of pink people will buy but I have yet to figured out a tactful way of saying "Please don't drown us in pink..." As she ages, if she loves pink then she loves pink... but I really hate needlessly gendered products and pink washing (I equally despise blue washing for boys...). Either way, I am excited to get clothes and stuffs together.
This is the first week I've had off and I am excited to get into the nursery this week. It has been set up for 4.5 years, but I need to get in there and do a deep cleaning. I am excited to get everything back in order and ready for a new baby.
A baby.
Until Next Time.
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